Trying to Find aPartner

One of the moststriking findings of a recent poll in the UK is that of the people interviewed,one in two believes that it is becoming more difficult to meet someone to starta

family with. Why aremany finding it increasingly difficult to start and sustain intimaterelationships?Does modem life really make it harder to fall in love?or are wemaking

it harder forourselves?

It is certainly thecase today that contemporary couples benefit in different ways from relationships.Women no longer rely upon partners for economic security or status.A

man doesn't expecthis spouse to be in sole charge of running his household and raising hischildren.

But perhaps theknowledge that we can live perfectly well without a partnership means that ittakes much more to persuade people to abandon their independence.

In theory,finding apartner should be much simpler these days.Only a few generations ago, yourchoice of soulmate（心上人）wasconstrained by geography , social

convention andfamily tradition.Although it was never explicit,many marriages were essentiallyarranged.

Now those barriershave been broken down.You can approach a builder or a brain surgeon in any barin any city on any given evening. When the world is your oyster（牡

蛎）,you surelyhave a better chance of finding a pearl.

But it seems thatthe old conventions have been replaced by an even tighter constraint:thetyranny of choice.

The expectations ofpartners are inflated to an unmanageable degreE.good looks,impressive salary,kindto grandmother,and right socks.There is no room for error in the first

impression.

We think that arelationship can be perfect.If it isn't,it is disposable.We work to protectourselves against future heartache and don't put in the hard emotional laborneeded to

build a strongrelationship .Of course,this is complicated by realities.The cost of housingand childrearing creates pressure to have a stable income and career before alife

partnership.

What does therecent poll show?

A.It is gettingmore difficult for a woman to find her husband.

B. It is gettingincreasingly difficult to start a family.

C. It is gettingmore difficult for a man to find his wife.

D. It is gettingincreasingly difficult to develop an intimate relationship with your spouse.